Moving a loved one to assisted living is a difficult decision.

One of the hardest decisions a home caregiver can make is that of moving a loved-one to an assisted living, memory care or skilled nursing facility. Sadly, as our population ages, more of us will be faced with making these critical care choices. Every day in the United States, 10,000 baby boomers turn 65; according to AARP, the number of older adults will more than double over the next several decades. In Sonoma County, 28% of residents are age 60+, making Sonoma County’s population the second oldest in the Bay Area.

The hard decision about housing typically comes when a loved one is no longer safe to live on their own and we cannot provide the round-the-clock care they need. We all have limits to our caregiving ability, and guilty feelings are a normal reaction to our changing roles and loss of control. It’s important to remember that you cannot control your loved one’s health or diseases; you can only do what is best for them and your situation.

Guilt is a hardwired emotion between a parent and child — especially in the face of sometimes tricky family dynamics. Moving a loved one is a serious decision and guilty feelings are a normal part of the process — but feeling guilty does not mean you’ve failed or broken a promise to your loved one.

Overcome your guilt

Allow your feelings and know that you’re not alone. Giving care 24/7 is emotionally and physically draining. Acknowledge that your loved one would not want you to jeopardize your own health or wellbeing by taking care of them. There are times when professional assistance is best for everyone. Instead of dwelling on negative emotions, try focusing on how this decision will benefit both you and your charge.

Seek others who will understand and can help you cope. Reach out for support from care groups, doctors and others who have gone through this process. Look for a residents’ family support group within the community you’ve chosen or contact local organizations such as the Redwood Caregiver Resource Center or local chapters of the Council on Aging or the Alzheimer’s Association. Know that guilt will lessen over time.

Sometimes after your loved one has relocated, you may feel guilty for feeling some relief. But consider the positives of placing your loved one in a senior community. They will likely benefit from the structure and stimulation of nursing home activities and a daily routine in an accepting and understanding environment. This placement gives your loved one the opportunity to socialize with other people who are in similar stages of aging.

Many seniors gain weight, and their physical and mental health improve when they have fresh cooked meals, medications on time, attentive physical care and opportunities to engage in activities such as music, art, exercise and games. In many cases, fellow residents are eager to include new people in the social aspect of group living. Group activities evoke feelings of camaraderie and human connection, which are necessary for well-being.    

It may also help to learn more about your loved one’s condition and how it will progress. Talk with their doctor about how to manage their decline and what you can do to facilitate their well-being in their new surroundings.

Finally, it’s vital to establish boundaries with those who may want to judge your decision. They have not walked in your shoes and should not be allowed to second-guess the choices you have made to keep your loved one safe and cared for. Don’t let others assign guilt to you.

Facilitating the transition

If possible, set up your loved one's room to mimic the layout and furniture of their former home. Hang photos and bring photo albums. To the best of your ability, ensure their care plan keeps their routines the same as before moving. This could mean the newspaper is delivered each morning or retaining a certain shower time. 

Make a framed document with “The Five Most Important Things to Know” about your loved one to help the staff have meaningful conversations with them. To this same end, create a magnetic legacy photo board so your loved ones can take each one down to hold them up close or show others (if necessary, seal the photos in plastic to help preserve them). When you visit, ask meaningful questions and record a little of their history for the staff and next generation to learn.

Take the time to acknowledge and appreciate that you are doing the best you can and deserve to have a life and relationships outside of caregiving. In many cases, relationships improve when you return to being a family member first and caregiver second. You will still oversee your loved one’s care, but the day-to-day stresses and responsibilities will be shared with a full support team.

Jet Howell is founder of Jet’s Senior Living Placement Solutions, which offers free senior placement services to families in Sonoma County and Northern California who need assisted living or memory care for a loved one. This was an article published in Sonoma Health Magazine and distributed in The Press Democrat newspaper.

Senior Placement Services: Finding the Perfect Home for Your Loved Ones

Are you looking for a senior living placement service that can help you find the perfect home for your loved ones? Jet's Senior Living Placement Solutions! Our team of experts has years of experience in the senior living industry, and we're here to help you every step of the way. From understanding your loved one's unique needs to finding the best fit for their lifestyle, we're committed to making the process as easy and stress-free as possible.

Why Choose Jet's Senior Living Placement Solutions?

Choosing a senior living placement service is an important decision, and we believe that Jet's Senior Living Placement Solutions is the best choice for several reasons.

Firstly, our team of experts has years of experience in the senior living industry. Unlike national agencies, Jet’s Senior Living Placement provides local, personalized, concierge-level support to help you find the right senior living community. We know the ins and outs of the different types of senior living communities and can provide you with the guidance and support you need to make the best decision for your loved one.

Secondly, we understand that each person has unique needs when it comes to senior living. Our team takes the time to get to know your loved one and understand their specific needs, preferences, and lifestyle so we can find the best fit for them.

Finally, we're committed to providing exceptional customer service every step of the way. We know that this process can be stressful and overwhelming, and we're here to make it as easy and stress-free as possible.

How Does Our Placement Process Work?

Our placement process is simple and straightforward.

Firstly, we'll take the time to understand your loved one's unique needs, preferences, and lifestyle. This includes things like their medical needs, preferred location, and social interests.

Next, we'll provide you with a list of senior living communities that we believe are the best fit for your loved one based on our assessment. We'll take the time to explain the different options and answer any questions you may have.

Once you've selected a community, we'll set up tours and help you navigate any paperwork or logistics. We'll also be available to answer any questions or provide support throughout the move-in process.

Understanding Your Loved One's Unique Needs

At Jet's Senior Living Placement Solutions, we understand that each person has unique needs when it comes to senior living. That's why we take the time to get to know your loved one and understand their specific needs and preferences.

For example, if your loved one has a medical condition that requires specialized care, we'll make sure to find a community that can provide that care. If your loved one enjoys staying active and social, we'll look for communities that offer a wide range of activities and amenities.

Our goal is to find a community that not only meets your loved one's basic needs but also supports their overall well-being and happiness.

Finding the Best Fit for Your Loved One's Lifestyle

When it comes to senior living, there's no one-size-fits-all solution. That's why we take the time to understand your loved one's lifestyle and preferences so we can find the best fit for them.

For example, if your loved one is an avid gardener, we'll look for communities with gardens or outdoor spaces where they can continue to pursue their passion. If your loved one enjoys cultural events or live music, we'll look for communities that offer those types of activities.

We believe that finding a community that aligns with your loved one's interests and lifestyle is key to their overall happiness and well-being. Our team has a deep knowledge of the different types of senior living communities available and can help you find the one that meets your loved one's unique needs and preferences.

Our Commitment to Customer Service

At Jet's Senior Living Placement Solutions, we're committed to providing exceptional customer service every step of the way. We know that navigating the senior living placement process can be overwhelming and emotional, and we're here to make it as easy and stress-free as possible.

From your first consultation to move-in day and beyond, our team will be there to answer any questions, provide support, and guide you through the process. We're dedicated to making sure that you and your loved one feel comfortable and confident throughout the entire journey.

FAQ

1. How much does Jet's Senior Living Placement Solutions cost?

Our placement services are completely free of charge to families. We're compensated by the senior living communities we work with, so you don't have to worry about any fees or hidden costs.

2. How long does the placement process take?

The placement process can vary depending on your loved one's unique needs and the availability of senior living communities in your preferred location. However, we typically recommend starting the process at least 60 days before your loved one needs to move.

3. What types of senior living communities do you work with?

We work with a wide range of senior living communities, including independent living, assisted living, memory care, and skilled nursing facilities. Our team can help you understand the differences between each type of community and find the best fit for your loved one's needs.

4. What happens if my loved one's needs change after they've moved in?

If your loved one's needs change after they've moved into a senior living community, our team is here to help. We can assist with transitioning to a different type of community or finding additional resources to support their changing needs.

5. How do I get started with Jet's Senior Living Placement Solutions?

Getting started is easy! Simply give us a call or fill out our online contact form, and one of our placement specialists will be in touch to schedule a consultation. We'll take the time to understand your loved one's unique needs and preferences and provide you with a personalized list of recommended senior living communities.

In Conclusion

Choosing a senior living community for your loved one can be a daunting task, but it doesn't have to be. Jet's Senior Living Placement Solutions is here to help make the process as easy and stress-free as possible. Our team of experts has years of experience in the senior living industry, and we're committed to providing exceptional customer service every step of the way. Contact us today to schedule a consultation and take the first step towards finding the perfect home for your loved one.